Monday, October 24, 2011

1 Month Old!

Wow, this has been the longest day month of my life. The days and nights seemed to have blurred together with all the feedings, changings, laundry, and not sleeping, but everyone keeps saying "it gets easier."

What does that REALLY mean?

I suppose it's sort of like when you get pregnant and everyone tells you "your life is going to change forever."

No one really tells you HOW.

Everyone also says that the first few months are hard, but that they are "worth it" and become "funny stories and memories" before you know it. I am starting to see this now and feel it's already worth it, but it's still a long road before these times will be "funny."

I would like to document what exactly my life has become so that anyone planning to welcome a little miracle into their life (or me in a few years) can know what they are getting themselves into.

First off, I would like to say that I am completely in love with my little boy and could stare at him all day. Babies blow my mind...such an incredible miracle. I can't believe we are so lucky to have our very own beautiful, perfect little boy.

That being said, the first four weeks of his life have been, at the risk of being vague, "life changing."

I had anticipated less sleep, less showers, and less going out.

Some of the "life changes" I wasn't expecting...
1. taking a shower has become a luxury
2. drying my hair has become flat out fancy (I have done it 4 times in the last 4 weeks)
3. wearing makeup/ perfume has lost its glamour as the perfume makes H sneeze and who the hell is going to see my makeup? Instead I smell like sour milk all the time and look ridiculously tired-- always :)
4. going somewhere like Target or the grocery store is not only terrifying, it's nearly impossible
5. my diaper bag is bigger (and infinitely more important) than my purse
6. 3 hours of sleep in a row is not only enough to get by, it's actually refreshing.
7. "sleeping when he sleeps" is a cruel thing to say as it is almost impossible
8. doing laundry every day is necessary...and somehow ends up being the same things every day that get washed (burp clothes, onesies, and the 3 things that fit me)
9. nursing bras and tops are awesome and all I wear...if I wear clothes. I have a bit of a nudist thing happening.
10. the baby blues are real!!! the first week was so intimidating and filled with anxiety for me I barely slept a wink or ate anything (kind of a positive- I lost 20 pounds in the first few days of being home...but not a pound more since then!).
11. the linea negra doesn't go away immediately- I read up and it can last up to a year! mine is starting to fade, but it's weird to still have this little stripe on my tummy.
12. I really, really miss Chris and the first two weeks I cried when he went to work.
13. 9pm feedings
14. 11pm feedings
15. 1am feedings
16. 3am feedings
17. 5am feedings
18. 7am feedings...just get up at this point.
19. poopy diapers have actually been something I've been excited about.
20. the DVR is my best friend :)
21. A new born baby can fart like a grown man! hehehe

There are some other little gems, but that pretty much summed up my life for the first 4 weeks.

Now we're onto 5 weeks and things are getting a little better. I'm much more emotionally stable (which everyone appreciates). We went to Jon and Ally's wedding this past weekend and had to leave Harrison overnight with my mom and Pete. It was nerve racking for all, but little man survived and I didn't have a stroke like I thought I was going to :) AAAAAAAND it was VERY nice to go out with my husband for a grown up night out.

Here's a few pix...a lot changes in a month!!

3 days old
"Has his Daddy's Jeans"
First Game Day- 1 week
1 week old
"Baby Bear"
With Uncle Justin after my first doctor's apt
7#14oz

2 weeks old
"At the Office"
With Aunt Sammy, 3 weeks old.




With Carlie- 3 weeks old

Big Yawn
Ridin' in the stroller


1 month old!

Hangin' out
Eyeing my Pacifier



Tummy Time

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

He's Here!!

So this post is a couple weeks late, but I've had my hands full to say the least!

The Birth

The night before our little one was born :)
Chris and I went to the hospital Sunday September 18th around 4pm for our induction "prep." For whatever reason, I imagined Sunday night as being a relaxing, comfortable evening complete with cozy pajamas and walking around the hospital followed by a good night's sleep in preparation for a leisurely induction Monday morning (whenever I woke up).

...I was a little off.

We got there and were immediately put in a room where I had to wear a "one size fits all" gown that really fits no one. My ties weren't even all there! I was put in a delivery bed that encourages you to lay on your back (a position that I HATED being 9 months pregnant). So, being stubborn, I layed on my sides and made Chris put on my cute, fuzzy socks for me (a task that had become impossible for me to do on my own). I couldn't really walk around because the baby and I were hooked up to all kinds of monitors. Going to the bathroom was more than an ordeal.

By 6pm I had cervidil applied (something that is supposed to soften the cervix). You're really not supposed to move at all once this is applied, so needless to say, I was REALLY comfortable after that...I felt like quarantined orca.

In my cantankerous state, I was letting my hormones get the best of me and I became a bit emotional: Chris got me ice chips and I got all choked up because I was so thankful. He apparently had been talking to my sister (who lives in Nashville) all weekend without me knowing and convinced her to come into town to be there for me.When she showed up a few hours after we got to the hospital, I had another nice crying session. They were both incredible all weekend, and made the whole experience so much better!

The nurses gave me ambien around 9pm to get some sleep in preparation for the next day. I was reluctant to take it, but knew I would never sleep on my own with all the dings, IV machines, BP cuffs going off every 15 minutes (my right arm was sore for three days!), and other miscellaneous sounds. I slept like a champ from 10-1, at which point I woke up with some pretty solid contractions- about every 5 minutes. I had only gained 1cm over night (in addition to the 2cm I started with), and was pretty miserable. I think they gave me the pitocin around 5am, but I am not the best historian concerning this night. Shortly after I got the pitocin, the pain was so intense, I asked for pain medicine. They gave me a shot of something (heroin?!?), and I felt MUCH better. I channeled Christopher from the Sopranos during his best shooting up scenes, and melted right into my bed. I fully comprehend drug addiction now.

The heroin-shot wore off by 10ish, at which point the contractions were so intense, I was shushing all the people in the room.  They called the epidural guy and he swept in with his magical needle around 11am. By 11:05, I was feeling pretty good again!

I have to say, I did feel guilty about taking the meds. I didn't drink carbonated beverages or eat deli meat for nearly 10 months, so a shot of heroin seemed like a bit of a cop out. However, I think my delivery would have encouraged me to entertain sterilization had I not had the meds.

At around 1pm I felt as though I needed to push (strange feeling). I can't really explain what this even felt like, and it could have just been me being tired of not having this baby, but I kept calling my nurse to tell her it was time to go! Also, I could hear other women nearby having their babies and I was jealous that they were done being pregnant.

She came every time I called, but kept telling me I wasn't quite ready... I must have called her every 10 minutes until she told me it was really time. Chris, Dr. Ayres, Staci our nurse were all in the room at this point, and Dr. Ayres kicked all the family out (my sister, mom, and mother in law). Once they left, he said "it's better with less people, unless you really want them here." I didn't care about anything at that point except getting this little boy OUT.

A few moments later, a random woman who was a pediatric nurse came in and stood by my head. While everyone else was very helpful and was encouraging, this crazy woman kept screaming into my ear "shoot him to the ceiling!! push him out like he's a bowel movement!" I LOATHED her!!! First of all, babies are NOT bowel movements and it's NOT the same kind of action. She was a broken record and it was all I could do not to swear at her. I didn't want Harrison's first moments on earth to be me cussing out the delivery team, so I refrained, but I did shush her to no avail though.

Also, the woman across the hall was also in labor and was too late for her epidural. She didn't speak English and kept screaming obscenities in Spanish. She screamed bloody murder the entire time I was pushing. I felt awful for her, and incredibly thankful for my epidural. I started to get upset about how much pain I could tell she was in, but Chris was my saving grace. He was incredible the whole time, always saying how much he loved me and saying a bunch of crap about how great I was doing (I didn't think so at the time). He was a good coach :)

I couldn't be more appreciative to have him as a husband and as the father of our baby boy.

FINALLY by 2:31pm (after about 30 minutes of active labor), our little buddy made it out into the world! I have never felt love the way I did the moment I saw my son. The intense love I have for my son and my husband moves me to tears on a daily basis.

...Though I do love them both so incredibly much,  I would like the crying to stop :) Damn hormones!

I have to say the labor wasn't as bad as I imagined. I think people like to tell first time mom's all their horror stories about how awful it is. Please don't be mistaken, it was no walk in the park, and I had my amazing epidural, but it was really only the last 5 minutes that were hellacious and miserable. It was still traumatic enough that Chris and I will be waiting a while before we embark on this type of life adventure again, but I'm not scared of SOMEDAY giving this little boy a baby brother or sister (by someday I mean YEARS from now).

Harrison Everett Maxwell
7 pounds 11 ounces
20.5 inches in length

Chris meeting his son for the first time <3
There isn't a great family picture that doesn't include my naked chest,
so this is my first pic with my baby boy :)

...I was pretty exhausted and Chris and I were having a moment.

I LOVE my boys!!!